Essays

Can You Enjoy the Beach Boys on Cassette?

A college professor once asked a class of around a hundred people if anyone had seen Citizen Kane.

Sep 19

Judging All Art by the Standards of Twentieth-Century Realism Was Never Insightful (and Is No Longer Funny)

First, some examples, all of which I’ve encountered in the last twenty years:

Sep 17

I love watercolors.

Sep 11

How to Write an H.P. Lovecraft Story

First of all, don’t.

Sep 9

Reading The Screwtape Letters Is Exhausting

A Book Review / Decent into Madness

Sep 5

The Essayification Scale

The essayification scale measures how easily a work of art can be replaced by an essay on the same topic.

Sep 1

The Greatest Opening Line in Literature

Sorry for the clickbait.

Aug 21

In Praise of Alexander Calder

You know, modern art isn’t a monolith, as I’ve written before.

Aug 17

Modern Art Does Not Exist

Is modern art any good?

Aug 16

Rhymes Don't Get Used Up

I once read some modernist poet asshole (think T. S. Eliot and his ilk) denigrate formal poetry because the vast majority of rhymes have all been used…

Aug 11

Delusion Buys You the Ticket

When I was in high school, there was this kid who was great at basketball: the fundamentals were baked into his DNA, he practiced nonstop, and on the…

Aug 6

If the Liberal Arts Are Dying, It Is Because They Have Been Perverted into Something that Deserves to Die

I hear the liberal arts are dying.

Jul 25

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